Merry Joshmas!!!
Fucking douche bag. You are offended because you think you are right and know it all. Fuck the Jews....right?!! There are other "traditions" and "beliefs" other than your own!!! ASSHOLE!!! I am SO sick of Christians being little bitches around the "Holidays".
How about this ... you ignorant pricks:
Do you think Jesus wanted us to exchange gifts on Christmas ... NO ... Santa did. Stop worrying about what language the retailers use. Just because you want to save a buck the christian way.
ANY CHRISTIAN WITH A CHRISTMAS TREE IS A HYPOCRITE!!!
Seriously, maybe it is time for me to go back to church. I will go back and complain the whole time. I will talk about how I feel the church is unfair and not right. I will be extremely verbal on MY belief's. I will be disruptive during sermons because I think I'm right. BECAUSE I AM. Let's see how long they allow me to attend.
(They will know we are Christians by our [love]) .... and judgement.
Happy FUCKING JOSHMAS!!!
HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!
I am SO happy!!! I just got back from a kick ass vacation in Mexico.
I came home to this:
By ALEX DOMINGUEZ
Wed Oct 31, 6:23 PM ET
BALTIMORE - A grieving father won a nearly $11 million verdict Wednesday against a fundamentalist Kansas church that pickets military funerals out of a belief that the war in Iraq is a punishment for the nation's tolerance of homosexuality.
Albert Snyder of York, Pa., sued the Westboro Baptist Church for unspecified damages after members demonstrated at the March 2006 funeral of his son, Lance Cpl. Matthew Snyder, who was killed in Iraq.
The jury first awarded $2.9 million in compensatory damages. It returned in the afternoon with its decision to award $6 million in punitive damages for invasion of privacy and $2 million for causing emotional distress.
Snyder's attorney, Craig Trebilcock, had urged jurors to determine an amount "that says don't do this in Maryland again. Do not bring your circus of hate to Maryland again."
Church members routinely picket funerals of military personnel killed in Iraq and Afghanistan, carrying signs such as "Thank God for dead soldiers" and "God hates fags."
A number of states have passed laws regarding funeral protests, and Congress has passed a law prohibiting such protests at federal cemeteries. But the Maryland lawsuit is believed to be the first filed by the family of a fallen serviceman.
The church and three of its leaders — the Rev. Fred Phelps and his two daughters, Shirley Phelps-Roper and Rebecca Phelps-Davis, 46 — were found liable for invasion of privacy and intent to inflict emotional distress.
Even the size of the award for compensating damages "far exceeds the net worth of the defendants," according to financial statements filed with the court, U.S. District Judge Richard Bennett noted.
Snyder claimed the protests intruded upon what should have been a private ceremony and sullied his memory of the event.
The church members testified they are following their religious beliefs by spreading the message that soldiers are dying because the nation is too tolerant of homosexuality.
Their attorneys maintained in closing arguments Tuesday that the burial was a public event and that even abhorrent points of view are protected by the First Amendment, which guarantees freedom of speech and religion.
Earlier, church members staged a demonstration outside the federal courthouse. Church founder Fred Phelps held a sign reading "God is your enemy," while Shirley Phelps-Roper stood on an American flag and carried a sign that read "God hates fag enablers." Members of the group sang "God Hates America" to the tune of "God Bless America."
Snyder sobbed when he heard the verdict, while members of the church greeted the news with tightlipped smiles.
Then I went to check their websites and found this:
Christmas came early this year!!!
So EFFING original
You can count on christians to be last people to do anything. Christian bands try to sound like secular ones (usually after the style isn't popular anymore). Christian movies/church videos are only knock offs of the sinful originals. Today I was turned onto godtube.com; the christian answer to the popular youtube.com. Blah. Next thing we know there will be a christian myspace. WAIT!!!! I just checked: jcpeople.com. DAMN!!! I can't believe it.
The church isn't a trend setter even though they think they are (you know, out being the "hip" salt and light). Don't you think if God was just a bit alive in the church, trends would follow the church. Wouldn't it be something powerful outside the walls of the church? Wouldn't the world be affected by the church. Instead, the church follows the trends of the world to find acceptance, to feel cool and to not feel too different. WTFWJD?
I have an idea!!! I am going to open a christian bar!!! All the alcohol will be prayed over before it is served. Only christian karaoke ... I mean worship will be sung. I mean karaoke ... you will read the words on the screen and sing along. Yea.
Alright, So I spent some time tonight watching some of the videos on godtube.com and I found one that interested me. You could tell it was used as a sermon illustration. But I think I might of taken the illustration the wrong way. Watch it first, then let me explain.
Like I said before...only knock offs. So effing hip.
Here is the description of the video:
This cartoon depicts how our world can distort the way we view things.
And here is the description I came up with:
This cartoon depicts the life of Josh Sager as he grew up within the church. From as early as he can remember he wore these EFFING glasses that supposedly saved him from burning in hell with the devil. As a scared little boy he listened to his sunday school teachers attentively and followed their instructions religiously. As he grew older, Jesus became cooler. Worship had drums. And we played jesus games at our jesus camps with our jesus friends and made jesus commitments. Right out of high school Josh volunteered his time with junior highers. Writing prescriptions for glasses of their own. He eventually got payed to do that. Hell, he wrote prescriptions he couldn't even fill. Then his glasses started giving him a headache. He would take them off behind closed doors to relieve the pain. He tried EVERYTHING to hide the pain ... even contact lens. Eventually the pain became too unbearable. Now he lives without the glasses and is able to see more clearly. Amen.
I could go on and on.
/rant over.
Religion
"All religion, my friend, is simply evolved out of fraud, fear, greed, imagination, and poetry."
~Edgar Allen Poe
And I thought I was an Apple guy
"Just in terms of allocation of time resources, religion is not very efficient. There's a lot more I could be doing on a Sunday morning."
Bill Gates, Time Magazine, January 13, 1996
US computer software designer & industrialist (1955 - )
The Post About Not Posting
I have been wanting to write something for so long. I keep posting videos from youtube.com like they are going out of style. (Hey...there is some funny sh*t out there) So tonight I sat down in front of the SCP Nation (My computer's name) and wanted to write something for my blog. Something thoughtful, something catchy, something f*cking AWESOME! I felt like a pastor again. Trying to be clever. Trying to win over my audience with my slick agenda. I couldn't think of anything.
So I searched for some "related" news. Blah. Nothing worth "complaining" about. Then it hit me .... The not wanting to blog ... was the blog.
I have not posted anything for a long time because I do not care. Stupid Church People will always be f*cking stupid! It is the nature of the beast.
Church isn't relevant to me anymore. Which is weird since I grew up in the church. I devoted my life to the church. Now I have no ties with a church. When I have visited churches in the past couple months, I feel like the outsider that doesn't understand. The friendly greeting is fake and the donuts don't entice me. Church is dead to me ... or ... I am just dead to church.
Then I start questioning everything. What do I BELIEVE? DA DA DAAAAAAHHHH!!!!! F*CK!!! Does it matter? Well, it does eternally speaking, right? I MIGHT GO TO HELL!!!! I WANT TO GO TO HEAVEN!!!! BUT .... BUT.... F*CK!!!! Wait!!! I can't say F*CK!!!! Oh SH*T!!!! I mean DAMN!!!! Is that word okay? God, I hope!!!! F*CK, I just used god's name in VAIN!!! AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
OK ... All joking aside. Right now I am listening to some good [seriously] "worship" music. I feel ssssssooooooooo good. But that is what our modern christianity is all about...right? Feeling good.
When I was a pastor, I used to tell kids that all I wanted was truth. Whatever that looked like. Now that I have learned that truth is a fabrication of the church, I now want reality. Reality is a broken church. Reality is a broken pastor. Reality is you ... broken.
So after trying to figure out what to write about .... here you go .... a lot of nothing. I still want change in the church but more importantly I want change in you and me.
Billy...
From: tmz.com
Rev. Billy Graham's cover photo for Time magazine is innocent enough in and of itself -- but when you look at it superimposed over the Time logo, it looks like someone drew devil's horns on him. Say your prayers!
The cover article, headlined "The Pastor In Chief," focuses on his "intense private and public relationships with every President going back to Harry Truman." The article does not mention, however, how Graham once said he thinks AIDS is a judgment of God.
Perhaps this cover is someone's judgment of him?
Hey Josh ...
I went to my brothers church today. I went because my brother was playing in the band and I wanted to see him. Today the assistant pastor was preaching from 1 Corinthians 5 (Expel the immortal brother). I know the pastor and he knows that I don't really go to church anymore.
Someone prayed and he walked up to give his sermon. He turned around and turned on his microphone. He looked at the congregation and saw me sitting there. He kind of chuckled... then said,"Hi Josh!". And then he continued into his sermon.
I just thought it was funny. How many times do you get greeted personally from the stage of a church you don't attend?
Jesus Juice
A couple months ago I brewed my own beer. I finally put labels on the bottles.
Let me know if you want a bottle or 2,3,4,5,6?
B-Day
Our waiter Luis kept bringing me more drinks without me ordering them. I had no clue what they were. The old guy behind me told me that I was his hero.
With bowling and El Ranchito, I could not ask for a better birthday. Thank you to my mom the enabler. I love you so much.
Zero hangover. I can't believe it.
484 Days, 9 Hours, 28 Minutes and 43 Seconds
"Did you feel the mountains tremble?
Did you hear the oceans roar?
When Josh Sager went back to church?"
It has been awhile since I attended a church. Today my wife and I went to church with her mom. Just like all the other pagans who only attend on Easter wearer their pastels. It was ok. The worship leader thought he was elvis costello and another guy in the band loved the shaker way too much. It was weird to sit there.
I have not been around fake people ... I mean christians for awhile. I was a little uncomfortable and won't be back next week. Maybe someday soon I can manage to attend church weekly. Not yet.
Oh yea .......... I didn't win a car. Damn.
Punk Church
I love it when they go to the evangelical school and the young people are wearing fucking polos.
In Tribute?
She did win a lot of awards because of the lord. I think this guy is a douche.
(I am not trying to be insensitive ... just posting what I found).
SCP Sighting #1
Steve Chastain (of stupidchurchpeople.com) was seen on TV last night at the clippers game. He was caught multiple times talking to the man next to him. Gay? Maybe. I still love him.
Jesus Camp
I finally got around to watching Jesus Camp. I just finished it and I am speechless. Have you seen the movie? What did you think?
This is exactly the reason why we need a website like SCP. This just scares the shit out of me.
Speechless.
Oh yea, check out HBO's Friends of God while you're at it.
Coming Soon ...
Very soon we will have some T-shirts and stickers for you all. Right now I am putting some designs together. Comment here or email me if you think of any good slogans or design ideas. I need all the help I can get.
Here are some real BAD T-shirts I found online:
And here are a few I felt worked a bit better:
So let me know what you guys come up with!
Josh Sager - The Idea Guy
I always come up with wild and crazy ideas. Some are great. Check out one of my random ideas that never took off.
The SCP Comic.
The artist never put out the effort to complete it. So hey ... now it is your turn. Draw your very own SCP themed comic strip and email it to me at josh@stupidchurchpeople.com. I will post the best ones. HAVE FUN!!!
